I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
