So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
