im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
