dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
