i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
