why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My balls are so social today.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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