Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
