they said they heard you say put it in my butt
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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