Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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