If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
