know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
