Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize