Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
