look no pants
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Too much gin, very little bucket
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
