i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i already hear my dad disowning me
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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