oh god the rape fog is back!
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
