If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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