How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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