Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
