walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
