Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
