Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize