i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.