Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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