Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...

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(256): View more from Alabama

I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.

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(913): View more from Kansas

all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar

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(870): View more from Arkansas

To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.

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(314): View more from Missouri

you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.

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(409): View more from Texas

I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.

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(206): View more from Washington

What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again

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(334): View more from Alabama

But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?

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