I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize