saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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