I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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