He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
this boner is exhausting
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize