I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
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i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
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yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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