So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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