you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize