why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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