This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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