can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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