I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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