We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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