Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize