How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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