Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
