I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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