Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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