I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
