There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
