and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
