dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
