Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I'd cum for enchiladas.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
