who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
