We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
