i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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